I reflect on the relationships I fostered throughout my life and conclude that the development of a fruitful coexistence hinges on your ability to be sensitive to the needs of others without neglecting your own. Whether you forge partnerships in business, among classmates or in love, the parties involved must engage each other harmoniously if the effort is to remain in tune. I developed this line of reasoning because of my own shortcomings. I found myself less accommodating to the needs of others and, unfortunately, weakened many of my partnerships as my desires began to carry precedent. I found myself interested in my wants, considering, “If I don’t take care of them, no one will.” Over time, I acknowledged the error of my ways, vowing to make a change; however, I’m still learning the choreography to the dance we do when we partner with one another.
A partnership only works when all parties commit fully to performing the duties required of the complex balancing act that determines success. Individuals must remain responsible for themselves and activities while maintaining understanding of the other party’s commitments while being willing to compromise when things don’t meld. The goal is to develop balance amongst each other. Articulate your desires and expectations and ascertain those of your partner.
Here are some tips to aid in the development of a healthy relationship:
- Problems are bound to occur. Deal with them immediately. A bad see can grow into a lurid issue that could end a relationship.
- Communication is KEY!!! Everyone is different and although the behaviors change, personalities remain the same.
- Sharing creates harmony in relationships. To give without question and expectation creates good rapport.
- Watch for cues. It’s essential to be observant because there are many things communicated to you nonverbally.
- Listen. Close your mouth and open your ears!
Even after accomplishing steps 1-5, don’t think the journey toward developing a healthy relationship is over. Despite efforts to put your best foot forward, we all stumble. Every now and again, I traverse rocky roads with my friend and business partner Samantha. We live a nation apart, literally as she resides in LA and I rest my head in Miami. Obviously, the distance apart puts strain on our relationship, but most of the time, that’s the least of our worries. We both have big mouths and a lot of attitude which led us to shed tears on more than one occasion. However, through it all, we’ve found building viable lines of communication takes time and, most importantly, patience. Regrettably for us, like many of you, patience is a bigger enemy than being broke.
Recently, I took a trip to Key West with my mom. While on the way to our destination, we had a disagreement. In my opinion, she wasn’t giving me credit for being patient in regard to the issue I was having with my car. “Crustacea,” what I playfully call my Honda Accord, has been in the shop since Thanksgiving. I recently came into good fortune and managed to muster up 2/3 of the cash needed to service my vehicle, yet 3 weeks later I saw no progress. I thought the world was going to end because shitty South Florida public transportation is not an option. When my mom made the claim that I was being impatient, I lost it. As a result, we spent the next 3 hours of a 4 hour drive from Davie to Key West, having a heart to heart.
In order to illustrate her case, my mother depicted an experience from her life. She explained to me that at 24 years old she believed that she was on the verge of motherhood. She dreamed of having a child and was looking forward to the birth of my brother Gabriel Bonano. Unfortunately, he lived only a few hours and she faced the prospect of a parent’s worst nightmare, the loss of a child. Afterwards, she explained that it took 6 months to speak to anyone and 25 years later, the pain was still apparent in her eyes as she held back tears. She relayed that, “you were the greatest gift God gave me,” as two years later I blessed her life with my presence.
Moments like these offer you perspective on your role and the depth of your relationship with others. At the time, I was confounded by my mother’s response. Now, however, I understand her reasoning. Above all, she wanted me to understand that you must remain patient enough to let things to run their course because the situation always appears dire, but patience allows for clarity and time heals all.
In response, I examined a number of things as they relate to my relationships. I resolve that although Sam and I have our fair share of disagreements, we’re on the right path. We’ve taken time to learn one another as we nurture our partnership for the future. Neither one of us are robots. It takes time for people to grow and mature, so keep in mind:
- Patience is an exercise of the soul.
- Open and clear communication is something to work toward and will not happen overnight. If you perceive that things are crumbling around you, take time to grasp the genuine nature of what’s occurred. The situation could be more or less desperate than believed.
- Re-evaluate your perspective
.jpg)
No comments:
Post a Comment